Hold the pickle, hold the lettuce... Recently I stopped into a Burger King -- not your typical move for a vegetarian who didn't love fast food even in his carnivore days. But I'd heard good things about BK's Impossible Burger, a plant-based burger imposter, from this construction-worker guy in their TV commercial. Wow, tastes like the real thing, the actor exclaimed. I'd also recently devoured Jonathan Safran Foer's meditation on climate change, We are the Weather, which powerfully illuminates the massive role of animal agriculture. Chew on this tidbit: if cows were a country, they'd be third behind the U.S. and China in greenhouse gas emissions. So, can faux-meat products possibly save the day? And what the heck do they taste like?
In search of answers, and to "have it your way" at BK, I walked west on Commonwealth Avenue to the scrummy yet charming Brighton neighborhood of Boston. That the joint's sign appeared to be held together by giant bungee cords was not a reassuring start to the culinary adventure.
In search of answers, and to "have it your way" at BK, I walked west on Commonwealth Avenue to the scrummy yet charming Brighton neighborhood of Boston. That the joint's sign appeared to be held together by giant bungee cords was not a reassuring start to the culinary adventure.
The inside of the "restaurant" was haphazardly clean and painfully well-lit. I ponied up $5.99 for the Impossible Whopper and nobody rolled their eyes, silently accusing me of un-American Activities or a lack of manliness. (Life Alive, an excellent vegetarian place on the Boston University stretch of Commonwealth Avenue, serves mostly women -- 85 percent gals, according to my unscientific assessments. Dudes squat next door at Chipotle.) Then I sat at a counter, looking out at a parking lot and chain-link fence. Opened the bag, pulled out my prize. Unwrapped that. Used a napkin to scrape off the mayo-sludge, ragged onions and war-surplus lettuce. Dug in.
Meh, it was okay -- no worse than my recollection of the meat-based Whopper. I mean, it seemed like a fast-food burger. Tasted like one, even looked like one. Semi-mealy mouth-feel, check. Dank taste, check. Heftiness in hand, check. Like I said, meh. So, not much of a test, was it? I suppose I should bring in a meat-eating friend and have her compare the dead-animal and plant-based Whoppers, rather than trying to conjure up distant memories of meat in my vegetarian-rewired brain.
By the way, six bucks? That's a lot for an unsightly heap of bread and brown stuff, so I was glad to hear that Burger King has lowered the price of the Impossible Whopper. And sorry to hear that the reason was poor sales. Now the Imp-Whop is part of BK's legendary two-for-six-bucks menu, whatever that entails. Next time I gotta buy two? Please, no.
Nonetheless, plant-based burger scientists, keep on trying! The nation of Cow is one of the prime drivers of climate change, whether we care to admit it or not.
Meh, it was okay -- no worse than my recollection of the meat-based Whopper. I mean, it seemed like a fast-food burger. Tasted like one, even looked like one. Semi-mealy mouth-feel, check. Dank taste, check. Heftiness in hand, check. Like I said, meh. So, not much of a test, was it? I suppose I should bring in a meat-eating friend and have her compare the dead-animal and plant-based Whoppers, rather than trying to conjure up distant memories of meat in my vegetarian-rewired brain.
By the way, six bucks? That's a lot for an unsightly heap of bread and brown stuff, so I was glad to hear that Burger King has lowered the price of the Impossible Whopper. And sorry to hear that the reason was poor sales. Now the Imp-Whop is part of BK's legendary two-for-six-bucks menu, whatever that entails. Next time I gotta buy two? Please, no.
Nonetheless, plant-based burger scientists, keep on trying! The nation of Cow is one of the prime drivers of climate change, whether we care to admit it or not.
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